I'M NOT A FLIRT

I'm often identified as a flirt and I've learned to accept it. So it’s safe to say I am a flirt, apparently. I wasn't born as one, most of the so called flirt who dwells in me is so much rooted in my personality, my ability to easily relate with the feminine, and the way I appreciate woman. It all has to do with my feelings and the way I relate to them. So let's unpack my feelings and possibly meanings if we can.

One fact I can't run away from is; I love girls. A friend of mine called Pholani, often sugar-quote this fact as simple as "Diyo love women.” Well, to some extent it's safe to say I love women, because I actually do, but specifically my heart is more into girls, my peers.

My perception of loving girls is slightly strange from that of an average person if not completely different. I must admit I have noticed the effect it has on the individuals when they hear that I love them. It's quite strange how girls associate the phrase "I love you" with commitment, intimacy, romance, and relationships. In fact these phrases are the first to occupy a woman's mind the first instance they hear these three magic words, I - LOVE - YOU.

Girls often rush into being defensive immediately they hear that someone loves them, without even taking a moment to appreciate that they are being loved. I often wonder where this fear of being loved generates from. Well, that's another topic, for another day.

As for me, loving someone is exactly that - LOVING SOMEONE. It's an innocent feeling that shouldn't be mistaken for something that's not it. Love is a natural feeling that generates from ones heart which should neither be explained nor suppressed. It's a feeling that should be shared and embraced. Communicating the feeling of love shouldn't reflect a call into commitment unless stated otherwise.

I strongly feel we should get used to the culture of loving and appreciating one another at the level of acquaintance and friendship. One should not be called into some form of commitment to experience what love is. Love is a feeling and it should be viewed as exactly that, not some set up between two people who intend to achieve some form of private amusement.

Our generation is likely to miss out from the pleasures of genuine love that is not associated with some degree of commitment and expectations. Love that voluntarily generates from within without being forcefully installed into one’s mind with a specified expected response and reaction. Let’s look around us, find people to love and love them, before someone invite us into something they’ve decided to label as love, while it’s actually not. You already know what love is, stop trying to explain it, just respond to it.