Thursday, July 9, 2015

DON'T SHOOT THE SIDECHICK!

Well... There is tons of answers to this question: We go out and meet girls who sweep us off our feet. We meet woman we'd like to explore. We bump into girls who make us feel good about ourselves. We are surrounded by woman who think they hard-to-get. We know egoistic girls who got to know "who is the man." And quite frankly, we find ourselves in situations where bitches want to give us the cookie, that's like "payment" without working. But there should be a fundamental reason why we niggers cheat... Should I break it down? 

 A single guy could meet a girl whom he "thinks" is a woman of his life. He would initially brush that idea off and "still" pursue the innocent young lady. Go out with her, and whatever happens after that is beyond the scope of this article. The point I am making here is; boys hardly know if they really want to pursue a relationship, nevertheless they are always willing to give it a shot, thus the concept "fell in love" was born. To guys, love is nothing like a new job. It's not something we just walk into and boom, "meet your fiancĂ©." Nope. Initially we just having fun, and then we realise there is something more than just a cookie in that jar. We don't walk into love, we just want to impress the young lady and oops... We've fallen. 

 Men love standards, in fact Steve Harvey suggest that "Men respect standards: Get Some," in his book: ACT LIKE A LADY, THINK LIKE A MAN. Standards don't only attract us to a woman, they keep us going, wanting more, and most importantly: Having the fear of losing out (or should we call it FOLO or maybe FOLOUT). There is nothing that draws a guy closer than that fear to his woman. It's the same as fear of going to hell to the majority of believers. Here we are not talking about cheating, don't get it twisted. Cheating could be a once of event, like a one night stand. We not talking about friends with benefits, which could extend for a period of time and also could be labeled as cheating. We are talking about having a consistent and ongoing relationship with a so called: sidechick. 

 Sidechicks are not a yesterday thing. They are the same reason our forefathers practised polygamy (or rather isithembu). Sidechicks are here to stay. King Solomon had those. They are not much of a burden to men, but a headache to girls. Good news girls is, the situation can be controlled. You don't have to save the world, you are not Jesus sweetheart. You can only save yourself. Here is how: 

 1. Take Steve's advise and get some standards. Your boyfriend love them. 

 2. Be hard to get and easy to please. Let him chase you. Give him hope that he will get you, but don't make it easy for him. 

 3. Don't call him, let him call you. Don't take him on a date, let him take you there. Don't pay for your dinner, give him an opportunity to know what it feels like being a provider. 

 4. Appreciate his effort, be receptive to his generosity, his complement. 

 5. Don't call him (in the first days, especially after the date), he will call you. But if you do call; just say "thanks for the other day, I really liked the movie." Or whatever he did for you. Please don't talk about feelings. 

 6. Don't give up your plans just to accommodate him. He need to know that you have a life. 

 7. Put yourself first. In fact, get your priorities right. You have a job maybe, a career, studies. Put those first. It also part of having some standards. 

 8. Have the ability to say no. Don't be harsh on him. Just be reasonable. If he ask for unreasonable favours, just say "I would have loved to but... "And give them an excuse. Tell him what you'll be doing. 

9. Don't give him the cookie too soon. If he get it on the second date. He knows a lot of guys have had it. It doesn't worth his commitment. You'll never believe how guys are always looking a reason not to commit. 

 10. Keep the fire burning. Never forget what attracted him to you in the first place. A year down the line. He still want the same gorgeous, inquisitive, mentally stimulating, and success driven Nonhle that hooked him in the first days. 

 11. Focus on yourself. I can never overemphasise the importance of this point. Men are attracted to woman who love themselves more than anything in the world. Never put him first in your life, and you'll keep him coming for more. 

 12. Make it clear you are not afraid of losing him, BUT: No noise. Guys hate noise. Especially coming from a woman that they like. Walk the walk. If he undermines you in anyway (including seeing a sidechick). Walk away, don't call. Let him make effort, hunt you down until he finds you. Feel up your time. Hangout with girlfriends and try and avoid talking about him. And when you eventually forgive him. Give him few and concise conditions. And please, do not remind him of his past mistake each time he forgets fetching you at the bus stop. 

My friend. If you think this through and adjust your relationship such that he never undermines you. Sidechicks are the thing of the past. And if he insist on those, never be afraid to walk away, he doesn't worth it. Give your life to someone who can handle it. Don't talk to much, don't shoot the sidechick; just walk away.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

THESE HOES BE LIKE: BAYAFANA!

Oh poor hottie. I guess you haven't got hold of the playbook. There are rules in this game of love, and I am not about to dish them out for you. But congratulations on your first discovery: Yep... Abafana bayafana. And they can be controlled, good news is, you don't necessarily have to be a control freak.

You know, there is a bunch of ladies and gents out there who are constantly involved on research studies based relationships just to make sure you have a quality relationship. The thing about you sweetheart is; You don't read. So I figured I could put it in a nutshell for you. Hope you have the balls to constantly visit this blog.

Back to guys. Yep, siyafana sisi. Good thing is, we are capable of changing. All you need to do is to understand a few things about us.

First things first. We don't go around looking for the one. But we are always willing to pursue you. A guy is forever ready to pursue the girl who's been next door  for 10 years, all of a sudden. And tell her the best lie of all times, "I've always loved you, I just never had the balls to confess it to you." Or a girl he just met 2 minutes ago and the young nigger will be like, "I don't know girl but there's something about you, that makes me wanna get to know you better."

Point is, you don't have to believe us right away. Somewhere inside us there is boy who'd like to date every girl in the world. And just as Steve Harvey put it in his book, ACT LIKE A LADY THINK LIKE A MAN, we boys are forever ready to eat the cookie. Your job is to always make effort to determine if we really want to be with you, or we just gaming and out to get the cookie.

The greatest mistake you girls make is believing everything we say, and the second of all is your inability to reverse the chemistry. If you could try to at least keep it low until you are sure of us, and then be able to reverse the chemistry if you suspect I have not really made up mind about you. It will do you a lot good. But because of your fear of losing the guy, you end up losing a lot in a process of trying to make him happy.

Well... I believe this is one of the couple of blog posts about relationships I am about to write. Try and digest this for now and keep coming back for more. If by any chance you have a thing or two to say to me. Or I never keep up to my promise. Get hold of me on my Facebook account and here is the link: www.facebook.com/diyosokhela

With love

STRANGE FRUIT

Sunday, January 25, 2015

ABSOLUTE MISUNDERSTANDINGS (LOVE STORY)

I always had female friends. I loved them. My friends always thought I wasn't lucky with the girls. As for me, It wasn't necessarily a challenge. I always thought of love as a natural phenomenon. Something that happens without being initiated. There is no better word to define this but CHEMISTRY.

I never approached any of my girls, I discovered them. I didn't pursue them, I gave them the room to get used to the idea of us being together. Falling in love was always an adventure... Oh, how I loved each event that led to the next.

I still love every chick I ever dated. I still cheer each time I see each one of them. The feeling haven't changed, and I think that's how the concept of moving on was born. I live it everyday. For I never stopped loving Thobile, Noxolo, Khanyi Willem, and Sbuicy... I only moved on.

Funny how Nomzamo is only my fifth girlfriend. Don't ask me about Yummygal or Naturale... I met those on MXit and I only kissed them through the phone #SouljaBoy.

I love girls. I value girls. I apprecite girls. I like making my feelings known. I hate hidding feelings. There is no significant relationship between how I feel and being in a romantic relationship. I believe that's where I'm commonly being misunderstood.

My adoptation of your concept of love is the only reason I nod when I'm being called #BadBoyDee. Otherwise, I don't know what the fuss is wrong with my concept of loving girls without opting for a relationship. Even more weird considering how hardly I throw my dick around.

Yours truly

DIYO SOKHELA (SIYABONGA)
+27 74 911 4054

Thursday, December 4, 2014

KO OF TEARGAS A COPY CAT?

Having branded and promoted Skhanda Nation since 2007 through media such as radio, social media and events. An upcoming Hip Hop artist named Mfundo Tshodeni, popular known as MT,  felt  reaped-off by Ntokozo Mdluli's move to name his latest album Skhanda Republic, recently released under CASH TIME LIFE.

In his latest single published on YouTube, Tshodeni points out he's rediculed by Mdluli claims that he wasn't aware of the existance of either Tshodeni or Skhanda Nation. This left Tshodeni fuming all the way to the studio to compose and immediately release a single titled "Skhanda Nation vs Skhanda Republic," that explicitely disses on Mdluli and claims he stole Skhanda Rap from Tshodeni. 

Since it's release on YouTube, Skhanda Nation vs Skhanda Republic has been making waves, hitting +13 000 views within the period of two months. It is rare for an unsigned artist to have such stats on YouTube. This could be viewed as the maturity of this beef boiling up between Tshodeni and Mdluli. Since the release of Skhanda Republic in October, a steady number of rappers is gradually claiming to be doing Skhanda Rap and the common thread connecting all their so called Skhanda Rap is how it sounds like KID X  and KO's  singles Pass n Special and Caracara respectively. Which reveals lack of research amongst upcoming artists and pre-maturity of adopting concept without understanding. 

In an brief interview I had with MT, he voiced out how he intends to expose Mdluli for what he is, emphasising how he invested his time, effort and resources in branding Skhanda Nation into what it is today. Especially on YFM's Hip Hop Show, Siz 'n Scoop, hosted by Sizwe Dhlomo and Siyabonga Ngwekazi. It remains unclear why Mdluli, having built his brand tirelessly since the days of Teargas, had to borrow some creativity and brand associations from Mr Tshodeni. While you are busy enjoying KO's album, expect this beef to surface anytime soon, as MT proves to be ticking time bomb, coming out underground. 


SIYABONGA SOKHELA (DIYO) 

VIRAL100 

DURBAN

Friday, August 22, 2014

CHRISTIAN NIGGA BE LIKE:

Siyabonga Sokhela sokhelasg@gmail.com

8/21/09
 
 
 
from: Siyabonga Sokhela sokhelasg@gmail.com
to: Khanyisile Willem <209199555 cput.ac.za="">
date: Fri, Aug 21, 2009 at 4:12 PM
subject: No Crushs
mailed-by: gmail.com
 
"One thing I can confirm is the fact that non of us was the reason for us to esparate and I think the fact that we are still communicating is the evidence.
 
My intention was not to hurt you. I actually wanted the best for the two of us and I triely believe that what we gonna get. according to the world there is no actual reason why we should separate but considering the fact that I am a christian, there are reasons. I understands you dont like it when I refar to the word of God but the truth is; it is the central part of my life. I no longer live just in my flesh but in the spirit also.
Indeed we had a wonderful relationship, I'm happy of all things that happened between us, it would be a great pleasure if we can do it again in future, but then it should be done in the "christian" way. indeed you are a great woman and you deserve nothing less than a guy like me, the problem is such guys like Diyo are so expensive. They demand patience, patince and more patience.
The Reason:
 
I was designed for one person just like Adam was designed for Marry. God is the one to decide when it's the right time for me to have a woman in my life, i am not expecting you to understand this now but let me tell you; In life there are only two ways. One is so broard and a multitude of people are on it. It is so nice to be in this road and in it there is no law, you do whatever you like as much as you want it, indeed it is fashionable. The only thing that is not good about it is the fact that it leads to eternal DEATH. Then thre is this narrow road that very few people are walking on it. It is so hard to walk, especially if you are living in this world. What's good about it is the fact that it leads to knowledge, the truth and ERTENAL LIFE. I prefar walking in this road as erternal life is just what I'm looking forward to.
I ended our relationship because I understood I had to wait, and God will be the one to tell when it's time and to give me the one especially designed for me. I swear he knows I love you. I'd love to spend my life with you but that shouldn't be what I'm concerned about. his word said "Seek His kingdom first and the rest will be added to your life" so mine is so search him and "you" if it's you, will be added in my life.
Just can't re-read this. forgive me if there are any errors"
 
I'm still in disbelief I said all this to a woman I loved. Especially at the age of 19...  LOL. It's really not funny though. I guess it was really hard being in Khanyisile's shoes back then. I still wonder how she broke the news to her friends, and how she comprehended all this.
 
 

Thursday, August 21, 2014

I BELIEVE IN LOVE


As a young boy growing up in the township, from lower primary, through HP, right to high school, I have learned one huge lesson when it comes to the matters of the heart. Loving someone doesn't always call for a romantic relationship. This lesson didn't drop like a bomb in my mind; I came to realize it through the humiliation my heart went through as I fell for one girl to the next.

I was doing grade three when I first met a woman I would have loved calling my wife. I wrote her love letters and she returned them. I was too young to have a dream back then, so she was my fantasy. I use to think about her every night when I go to bed and in the morning when I woke. I knew very little about God back then, but I took time to pray for her. I loved with an innocent heart, the nature of love that's not related to knowledge, wealth, or achievements. I loved that young woman simply because I did, not because I knew why.

Maturity began the day I realize I wasn't really going to marry that young lady. Some might say that's when reality stroke. I'd like to think that's when the innocent of young love got contaminated. According to the English dictionary, to contaminate is to make (something) dangerous, dirty, or impure by adding something harmful or undesirable to it.

The moment we allow external factors like age, achievements, level of education, faith, etc. to determine whether we want to be with someone or not, that's the moment we lose the purity of love. Thinking of the very 1st person we ever fell in love with as kids, we all can determine where we lost the love we all seem not to believe in.

We have been made to believe that the ultimate expression of love toward someone is marrying them. I can't agree any less to that. However we need to approach love as a concept that's beyond just romance but as a way of relating to the people around us, and that's the whole point I'm trying to make here. While this sounds much easier in theory, it is often hard in practise, particularly when a guy loves women outside of a relationship.

I personally have loved women, lots of them. Some of my good friends I've been with at crucial stages in my life were women. I'm talking about the year I did my grade 11 and matric, my 2nd year at varsity, my 1st year at College after I dropped out at varsity. Most of my friendships were mistaken as affairs, which didn't bother me so much.

Having had plentiful female friends, I learn to understand and appreciate women, love them for who they are, envision the worse, hope for the best, and most of all; settle for what's on offer without a spark of dissatisfaction.

I believe in love, all sorts of love. I love love and I love loving it. It's such an awesome feeling I'd love to share with the rest of the world. I love the way it's confuse and fascinate people. I find pleasure in all love-related concepts, and I'd like the world to know that.


 

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

DREAM GIRL (Poem)


I kissed a girl in my dream
My dream girl
The woman of my dreams
The kiss was shorter than I wanted it to be
But longer than I expected
It was a brief deep kiss
I kissed a girl in my dream

We shared a hug at daylight
It was warmer than the sunlight
It was the highlight of my night
She offered more than the comfort
I experienced a golden touch in my sleep
It was more awesome than a wedding cake
It was a dream touch in the dreamland of my sleep
I kissed a girl in my sleep
My dream girl
The woman of my deams

It was a skin on skin kinda kiss
I exposed my tongue onto her saliva
I was more than willing... I was winning
It was more explicit than a sextape
I still wish for a clip
I still feel her tongue rushing through my mouth
My lips, her lips
My chest, her breast
My hands, her hips
In my sleep we did it all

I kissed a girl in my dream
My dream girl
The woman of my dreams
She held me close
I held her tight
I swallowed herself into my heart
Just for a sec I felt complete
It was one plus one that made us one
I felt her blood rush in my veins
My hear-beat kick was not in vain
The song I heard I wish to play
The kiss I shared I wish to keep
For another day or year or life

I kissed a girl in my dream
My dream girl
The woman of my dreams
The distinction between dreams and reality is huge
But still I dream my dream could live
I got effort to put
Mind to think
Time to invest
Desires to fullfil
Feelings to express
A woman to impress
Weaknesses to overcome
Love to give
Wedding to attend
And a lifetime to share

I kissed a girl in my dream
My dream girl
The woman of my dreams

Saturday, June 7, 2014

THE LIPS OF A SEDUCTIVE WOMAN

I'd like to think of a bible as a God-inspired book, a book that carries the good and sacred news. Having paged it for some time, it never ceases to amaze me how explicit it can put the sensitive scriptures at times. I'm no really an analyst when it comes into matters of the God's word, but I couldn't hold myself back when it mentioned the phrase "Lips of a seductive woman."
Certainly every dude, or at least most of us as guys, would like to know what the bible got to say about this fascinating limb of a woman, especially the seductive woman. Well, to your surprise the scripture does mention that the lips of a seductive woman are as sweet as honey. Personally I can't agree any less. I mean, we all want a piece of that honeycomb at one point or another. A typical dude will always seek to suck all the juices on those lips dripping limitless honey. The wisest and richest King Solomon might have witnessed some crazy romance in his lifetime to scribble such explicit proverbs.
Having mentioned how juicy the lips of a seductive woman are, it didn't surprise me when King Solo mentioned that even "her speech is as smooth as oil." Sounds like a typical girl you've met, isn't? Probably your ex or even yourself my sister, LOL… Kidding. Jokes aside, but we've all met a chick of this calibre, they’re not hard to find, not soooo hard to get, but extreme to keep, or even to please on a long-term basis. Personally I haven't had much luck (if I can put it that way) when it comes to them, but I must confess I've desired such women, even lusted after them.
 
You see, romance really does make the world go round, or at least the mind. It has got some of us moving from one relationship to the next, while some of us have chosen to remain single, so we can chow whatever get into our plate. It doesn’t astonish me that some people think romance/sexual performance is the key factor that can keep a relationship going. I mean, how often you have heard a woman saying "Coz I satisfy you, why you are doing this to me?" This is caused by the belief that sexual satisfaction is all man are looking for, pity this isn’t the truth.
 
The turn around in this scripture is on the mention that, indeed, though her lips are as sweet as honey, her speech smooth as oil, but her steps could possibly lead to death. I hope King Solo was not meaning the cat walk here (Joking). Well... we all love women or at least I do. Further readings of the scripture could confirm that indeed it's not wrong to love women; beautiful, sexy or even seductive women. It's just the way we do it.

A wise man once said that God use sex to drive men into marriage. So I guess every man should have that one woman in her life to satisfy all her "dirty" desires, and that woman is called wife. Yes we all love playing around, it's fun, silly, and to some extent it’s childish. But at some stage each one of us would have to man up, do the right thing, have that one, and I mean one, special someone you'll call wife, or husband.


We can't chase after those seductive lips forever. Otherwise if you still chasing them, good luck, I hope it won't be too late when you start looking for a way out. My advice is; Be smart, read scriptures, and tell wrong from right. If by any chance I have wronged anyone through this post, God have mercy on me.





Tuesday, June 3, 2014

I'M NOT A FLIRT

I'm often identified as a flirt and I've learned to accept it. So it’s safe to say I am a flirt, apparently. I wasn't born as one, most of the so called flirt who dwells in me is so much rooted in my personality, my ability to easily relate with the feminine, and the way I appreciate woman. It all has to do with my feelings and the way I relate to them. So let's unpack my feelings and possibly meanings if we can.
One fact I can't run away from is; I love girls. A friend of mine called Pholani, often sugar-quote this fact as simple as "Diyo love women.” Well, to some extent it's safe to say I love women, because I actually do, but specifically my heart is more into girls, my peers.
My perception of loving girls is slightly strange from that of an average person if not completely different. I must admit I have noticed the effect it has on the individuals when they hear that I love them. It's quite strange how girls associate the phrase "I love you" with commitment, intimacy, romance, and relationships. In fact these phrases are the first to occupy a woman's mind the first instance they hear these three magic words, I - LOVE - YOU.
Girls often rush into being defensive immediately they hear that someone loves them, without even taking a moment to appreciate that they are being loved. I often wonder where this fear of being loved generates from. Well, that's another topic, for another day.
As for me, loving someone is exactly that - LOVING SOMEONE. It's an innocent feeling that shouldn't be mistaken for something that's not it. Love is a natural feeling that generates from ones heart which should neither be explained nor suppressed. It's a feeling that should be shared and embraced. Communicating the feeling of love shouldn't reflect a call into commitment unless stated otherwise.
I strongly feel we should get used to the culture of loving and appreciating one another at the level of acquaintance and friendship. One should not be called into some form of commitment to experience what love is. Love is a feeling and it should be viewed as exactly that, not some set up between two people who intend to achieve some form of private amusement.
Our generation is likely to miss out from the pleasures of genuine love that is not associated with some degree of commitment and expectations. Love that voluntarily generates from within without being forcefully installed into one’s mind with a specified expected response and reaction. Let’s look around us, find people to love and love them, before someone invite us into something they’ve decided to label as love, while it’s actually not. You already know what love is, stop trying to explain it, just respond to it.





Wednesday, May 28, 2014

She Inspired My Best Poem - Maybe


 I've always had a soft spot for my friend, my female friend, Thobeka Sithole. Even as I begin typing this post I can sense a huge cloud of love taking over my heart. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who understands this feeling, a feeling that shouldn't be either hidden or explained, a state of being. That's friendship love according to me.

Thobeka is a young, fairly beautiful and much conservative girl who lives by my place in the neighbourhood. She came into the hood to start and complete her high school education. She was a class behind me and we didn't go to the same high school. Being ahead of her, I went to varsity first.

While I was on my 2nd year at UKZN, she asked if I can help her apply at the university and I had to say yes. This was simply because it comes natural for us varsity students to desire to help the new entrants to varsity that comes after us. I knew helping Thobeka was going to be a pleasant journey, as before this I had never been close to her.

We started off well, as I helped her from identifying the relevant courses and institutions she could possibly pursue, filling in of forms, mailing to Central Applications Office, to awaiting the responses. It all went well. Everything seemed according, until she had to visit home in rural areas, where she stayed a little longer than I expected.

I began to be concerned if she was following through with CAO. On the 31st of December, I had a great concern about the follow ups with CAO and the status of her application that I had to call her around 10 O'clock in the morning. It was a brief call, it was to the point. So she promised to come back to the hood ASAP and deal with the "varsity" issue.

It was just after this call that I caught myself saying "Maybe I'm too serious about this friendship". I immediately sensed weirdness and contrary in this statement. How can I be "too serious" about "this" friendship? On top of being weird, I also noticed this statement was poetic, and so immediately I started scribbling a poem and commenced with exactly the phrase "Maybe I'm too serious about this friendship".

One thing one should note is that all that the poem says after that was not specifically talking about the nature of a friendship I had with Thobeka, and the poem doesn't necessarily speak to her. However, it shouldn't be overlooked that the poem was fully triggered by her. I cannot take away the credit from my friend for inspiring such a wonderful piece of art.

This poem is highly loved and cherished by multitudes, and has installed thousands of smiles to a plentiful guys and girls out there. Never even for a single day have I taken time to alert people about the inspiration behind this poem, so it was of great importance to me that I do this.

I am also thankful to Thobeka Sithole for inspiring such a wonderful poem. I earnestly love her for that and she will always be my friend, if not more. I hope God keep her for longer and make her a great inspiration to the world out there.


Thobeka Sithole. A girl from the neighbourhood who inspired one classical poem I ever wrote. I salute you friend. Uthando novuyo.

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

I AM FATHER

Time flies when you are having fun, so our beloved friends claim. Well, fun or not, sometimes time just flies. Wasn't it yesterday when I kick-started this blog? Before you know, I'm a father.

 
For me it's been a weird experience, a journey indeed. I must confess it hasn’t been much of an easy one, to an extent that I haven't mentioned a word about it, not even a Facebook wall post. To imagine I didn't even say a word about pregnancy. Let alone telling the world that the dude is a father now. Some would claim I was ashamed or any negative energy around that. Truth is it was the question of values, self-worth of my child and a bit of privacy.

 
I mean I didn't even know his values, his personality and how would he feel about being in the eyes of the public from birth. I can't even begin to mention how strict I was regarding who get to have his pictures when my son was born. How I emphasized I was going to “kill” anyone who would have published his pictures of Social Networks, all because I wanted him to have his privacy.

My son is a big boy now. 7 months and 2 Weeks old, he has the world under his feet. He's one active person I've had to meet in my family... hyperactive and with a very sharp brain, a big smile and a broader voice, just like daddy.

A lot is yet to unfold, and I'm confident he'll have it all under control as he grows and matures. Being my son, it's no question a lot is expected of him, but as for now, absolutely no pressure. I am patiently waiting to see him grow and make his own personalised choices in life. He’s got all the guidance he'll ever ask for from daddy, and of course her mom, Nomzamo Mthembu (My girlfriend).


To him, son, daddy knows one day you'll grow up and be able to read this blog post, maybe mom will read it for you once or twice before then. Just know, daddy loves you, and he'll never do anything to hurt you in life. Take charge; grow up to be no one but yourself. The world is yours and it's yours for the taking. Same goes to all your friends out there you are yet to meet. Have courage and possess the spirit of taking over, it's all in those big brains beneath that thin skull.
Much love son… Brains Busa Sokhela.



SIGNIN' OUT


Daddy Dee.

Friday, May 31, 2013

Been a While Hey

They say time flies when you are having fun, but really? doah... It's true, but seemingly that not the only time when the time flies. In short, as we all have heard before, time waits for no man. Not so long ago I introduced you to my "wife", before you know, it's another year and for more than six months I haven't posted a single article. Certainly my stalkers were starting to be worried hey... or isn't?

I'll just sum up a few events that have happened in my life for these past few months. A lot has happened hey, I doubt I'll have audacity to say it's all, and there is that I can’t wait to share. Some I'll update you on the next few articles.
On top of the list is CODE209 Promotions, if your ears has been on the ground, you must have a thing or two about this. This is a new kid on the block, here to take the music and the entertainment industry by storm. Their focus is to create entertainment at universities utilising raw, unexhausted talent in the music industry. These guys go an extra mile in uncovering talent, monitor and shape their growth with the ultimate aim on converting these artist into brands. Their whole vision is embedded in their slogan which states, "Encoding Tomorrow's Brands", otherwise feel free to find out more about CODE209 Promotions at their blog, CODE209 PRO.
Secondly it's varsity. Damn... I had a great year last year. Everything went smooth. Classmates were great. Some of them really made my year; the like of Nomzamo, Buyi, S'thoko, Grace, Lucky... well the list goes on and on. They were there to be the motivation when times were tough, especially Nomzamo and STK, those were really my darlings. These I'll hardly forget even on my aging days.
Lastly, Kushobani is at pose, I had a heart-felt break-up last year, with the irreplaceable, Sbuicy. Sadly I'm the one to blame for that. I'm only glad she recovered from the broken-heart and we are currently taking it is as casual friends.

So far 2013 has been smooth, challenges there and there at home, and this big event you still going to learn about that happened in my life, a life changing (if not threatening) event.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, this is still your favourite dude in town, Diyo. Until we talk again, I'm signing out.

 Cheers.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Meet My Wife...

This morning I woke up with a lil bit of sadness in my heart. Thinking how often have I failed to obey my God. Truth be told, compared to millions of people out there, I'm above average, but this shouldn't be the passport to settle for the second best.

As a 22-year old boy, or should I say a man? Quite often I realize there is so much in-store that God has for me. There are tons of potential hidden in my inner-being that I haven't yet released. So much. I don't even want to mention a few... the list is too endless. Amongst these lies marriage with a beautiful lady I pictured this morning. How did I end up with the picture of this madam in my photographic memory? I was overwhelmed with God's expectation that I should save my sexuality for this special lady. At this day and age, for a dude growin up in the hood It is a lil deficult to put ones actions together. But glory must be given to God who, through Christ, has made all things possible. Back to madam... Next paragraph, LOL.

B.E.A.U.T.I..F.U.L... In spirit and on sight. I've never met such a beautiful lady in my life. Everything about her. Her speech, her walk, her looks, her cooks. She is so beautiful. She got brains and everything she says makes absolute sense. You'll swear she's been thinkin for an hour when she responds to a quetion asked just a sec ago. She always have a sensible word to speak in every situation. She can calm a storm with a phrase. She is polite, her voice is clothed with a hopnotic and seductive tone. Quite often she tries to hide the beauty of her voice when she is amongst strangers, since she is normally mistaken as a flirt if she's in her normal voice.

While many people know her as this lovey dovey kinda woman, there is a side of her that many haven't seen. She never settles for the second best. She never compromises her standards, and she doesn't tolerate nonsense, not even from me. As much as she doesn't like to dictate people around, she doesn't like being dictated too. She is not normally up for leadership but quite often people chose to fall her. She always conduct herself in an appropriate manner, though she is not a woman who normally conform to rules. It can be said that many rules, even those not yet made, have a tendancy of conforming ot her subconscious ethics.

Damn... I know you are dying to meet this angellic being, so am I. God hasn't introduce me to her yet, I trust He will soon. She is one thing that keeps me going even when the going gets tougher. I'm sad I just got her picture recently. I'm sad I can't produce anything tangible to prove her existance at this point in time. But I'm quite excited she is out there patiently waiting for me. Most of all, I owe to her to keep myself too. So she also may find myself in my best condition. Trust me, good isn't enough for this girl...*smilling*

Meet my wife... Meet Mrs Sokhela

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Way of Purity

Recently I briefly introduced you to an online ministry that has been helping God's people to find freedom from habitual sins. At this point, it’s a lil earlier to elaborate on why exactly I visited this site. This is going to be more clearer as I share with you some of the material on my coursework/


What I'd like to tell you today is; this is the actual course I'm doing on Setting Captives Free. I am currently seating on Day 25. Here is it brief introduction:

You have arrived at Setting Captives Free The Way of Purity course, the 60-Day interactive course that will teach you to enjoy a newfound relationship with the Lord and how to find freedom from sexual impurity. It is possible, and you can learn how.

If you know someone who'll benefit from this programme. Feel free to introduce him or her to SCF. You are more than welcome to email me, just click here if you need to talk.


In Christ
Diyo Sokhela
STUDENT@SCF


Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Setting Captives Free

I want to introduce you to Setting Captives Free. An online-based ministry that has been setting captives free for a while now. I'll tell you how did I get to know about them and why am I introducing you to these guys later. What you should know for now is that I benefited a lot from them. Here is how they introduces themselves on their website:

Find Freedom Today!

Welcome to Setting Captives Free. Every day we help people just like you find freedom from habitual sins and learn to grow in grace. Our Christ-centered courses are free of charge and help people just like you escape impurity, over-eating, substance abuse, gambling, smoking and more. Join the more than 396,475 people who have benefited from Setting Captives Free. We’re glad you’re here, and we’re here to help!


For a while we haven't been able to open up on our dark struggles, but the more we hide is the bigger we open the room for habitual sins in our lives. Sure you want to live in slavery forever, neither do I. That actually the reason why Christ came. Luckily now freedom is at your fingertip. Well for now you can check up Setting Captives Free... Ngizokubona later (See you later).

Friday, August 24, 2012

I'm Losing a Friend... It Hurts

Some relationships were meant to last forever. Well... others were not. Either way, we all have to enjoy our relationships while they last. Irrespective of their nature. 'Realising what we had when it gone' isn't just a proverb, it's a situation most of us have, or maybe will, experiance once in a while. Some will learn this from the experiences of others. While some of us will have to personally go through this route.

Why am I saying this? Well... I think my friend is dumping me. Recently I'm losing touch with her. She's so much angry with me. For various reasons I'm not even certain about. She no longer wants to be in touch with me. Seemingly she has no intention of discussing the reasons behind this coldness she's been showering me with. I know I'm not the best friend she'll ever have. However, the last time I checked I was her best friend. Not just that but the best she ever had (so she said). For me, it's not a normal case to be someone's best friend ever. For that reason, I've been fighting to have her back in my life. Honestly speaking I'm not ready to lose her. Seemingly, I just did.

I love my friend. So much. Yes! for many times I've hurt her. I'm not proud of that. On the other hand, for a while I've been her source of happiness. Isn't it ironic how we hurt the people we love, and those who love us back? No it's not, trust me. It's in this friendship I've learned that. Think about this; Why would you be hurt if someone you just don't care about betrayed you, failed to keep a promise, or failed to spare you some time? You won't hurt. Simply because this person has no much control over your feelings. So tell me, why are you so surprized that the people you love are those who hurt you most?

I'm not willing to reveal much about my friend and I. As a matter of fact I doubt even that she'll approve of me publishing this article, but I guess I did publish it. After all, she might not even see it.  I love my friend. I guess I'll always do. Whether she is around or too far, whether she's still a friend or a frienemy.

I can't say I wish her all the best with her future friendships. Why? Because I haven't accepted that she's no longer with me. However if things ends this way, she have my blessings. If there is one thing I'd like her never to forget is: I love her.

His loving friend
Diyo Sokhela
+27749114054

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Opposite Sex Friends

I've written many poems about friends of opposite sex. Most of which I've never recited. At the back of my mind I always knew, like my poem entitled 'Maybe' says; friends were meant to love one another.

Yes it's true; many of my poems about such friendships were inspired by friendships I've been in. Like all sorts of friendships, some did work, others didn't. Though these friendships might have not worked, still the poems inspired by them endure. Here is the reason; Poets (or at least I) don't normally write about specific people, events, situations, or scenarios, they simply draw inspiration and write about whatever that inspiration leads them into. For this reason, the poems I wrote didn't normally talks about these friendships specifically, rather they enlightened the audience about the nature of friendships I've been through and situations I've encountered. As a result, when some of such friendships fail... poems endure.

There is one common danger of being friend with a person of opposite sex. Confusion. Most of such friendships begin with a clear purpose, friendship. For some folks, like myself, who are naturally sweet and love making their friends to feel special and appreciated, there is a danger that the nature of friendship you're in might be mistaken for something mO0ore than just friendship. This suspicion isn't always raised by outsiders, even  the friend you're in the relationship with, might.

Sure there is nothing wrong with couples who start off as friends. In fact, relationships that start off as friendships and grow into something deeper are most likely to work, if well nurtured, compared to those where a couple was either familiar with one another or they seldom met in the street and suddenly started going out. Here is the point; not all friendships of opposite sex should be anticipated to grow into a romantic relationship or even marriage. The mentality of expecting a friendship to grow into something deeper usually steal from the two, as a result, you fail to enjoy the benefits of being purely friends. Here I'm not referring to the benefits of the friends categorised as 'friends with benefits'. I'm talkin about the benefit of having someone to talk to, share your raw thoughts with, without being under pressure to impress. Someone who'll accept you as you are and be purely a friend who isn't obligated to please you or put a smile on your face.

I've been with a couple of female friends. Almost all of these friendships were a great experience and they taught me lots about girls. Like the fact that girls are not necessarily materialistic, but still they are willing to accept it when guys wish to spend on them. Sure they like guys, but it's not always that they intend to develop affairs with those they like. They are not always looking for hunks, charmers, money-spenders, celebs and all that, normally they want to be with someone who can put a smile on their face without trying too hard. Deep within their hearts they know, they'll rather be with someone with lots of brains rather than a mindless millionaire.

A word to the guys: Girls are not always interested to you as boyfriends, at times you should be willing to settle for just friendship. Here is one more fact (or should I say my opinion?) about friendships; you don't have to plan them, friendships are most likely to work if they were not ignited like fire, rather they work much better if they react like chemicals that accidentally got into contact. LOL... It's called chemistry.



Thursday, May 3, 2012

Damn... School Is Cool

Some will agree, both bookworms and party animals and everything in between. Others won't agree, and yes it does matter, though it doesn't affect how I feel about school. School has always been part of me, and it will continue to be (or at least I think so). Trues there is more to life than just schooling. That become even clearer when you consider that there is parenting ahead. Another challenging world I am anticipating to live in. However since the wedding bells haven't rang yet, we better focus on school.


I was out of school for a year, after things didn't work out accordingly at University of KwaZulu Natal, Westville Campus. The idea of being home for a year didn't sounds right, but I thought a gap year was ideal, so I can make up my mind on what exactly I wanted to do with my life, have a full picture on what exactly would I like to invest my precious time into. Thanks to Kushobani Org., Durban Poetry & Art industry, and entertainment as a whole. It's a year later now, honestly I don't feel like I flushes a year away, actually i didn't. Instead I've invested a lot into my future with regards into finding the direction.

I learned a lot during my gap year. Tasting a complete new life since I started school at the age of six. Interacting with talented and much creative youth, not-yet employed undergraduate students, art "experts" and a lot of people who added value into my little life granted to me by the highest God.



It's 2012 now and I'm back to my roots... back to my books (laughing). Schooling is sooo cool. Especially now that I'm doing a course I personally "think" I like. On my first three months of schooling, having made a lots of cool friends around Durban University of Technology, ML Sultan Campus, with wide variety of backgrounds, adapted to a new environment of studying, but most of all; achieved good looking marks on almost all my modules(I will be boasting to reveal the exact marks*).  To all the students who had enough courage to pick up their bruised egos and pursue a 2nd qualification after a first attempt, I say big up.

Like I said earlier on... Skwl iz Kwl...

Thursday, November 10, 2011

My Growth Through Sessions

From Dr. J.L Dube High School Hall to Lacoste Lounge. Brand new venue, same old session. Having been part of such an interesting bunch of people with consistance has yield such tasteful fruits. Though the journey wasn't easy, but it would be lying to claim it was tough. With determination alone. I managed to reach "this far."

Having started writing poems in July 2009. It is quite deficult to believe I have grown this "size," not just a poet but an artist as a whole. My first sessions weren't so good. I had to spend about two hours every Saturday at a poetry session saturated with strangers that keep changing faces week in and week out. There was never a week that passed by without me seeing a new face in a session, which made the job of adapting amongst the fellow poets such a deficult one. Weeks use to pass by, and just when I think I've met everyone, the face of a so called veterean will pop up. The assignments of claiming the complete acceptance couldn't reach an end, from January 2010 to January 2011.

It's was up until the day I started to visit this friend of mine called Pholani that I started to understand the principles of Kushobani Arts Organisation. He will bombard me with lots of information each time I pay him a visit concerning Kushobani Organisation and Poetry industry as a whole. What he didn't know is that I wasn't so much interested in that. I wanted to uncover the reasons behind his survival as a poet in the industry. Of which I did discover. I would have like to share much about his survival, but just to mention the few things that contributed on it. I can confidently say that his friendly approach towards complete strangers and the ability to read and understand peoples' behavior were the major contributors.

Most of the things I learned from Pholani, I applied when I first attended the Keen Artist Theatre Open Mics at the Asoka Theatre at UKZN Westville Campus in the 1st semester of 2010. When I officially became KAT member in July 2010, alongside with my friend Juba, who later on join me at KAO, Adapting into the vibrant atmosphere of artists and enjoying myself was a walk in the park.

Durban poetry sessions has been a blessing to me. These include the Pour A Tree Society, Horwad College Poetry Session and all the others I've attended. Looking at myself hosting Peers Sundae Poetry & Hip Hop Show is such an emotional experiance when I look back where I'm coming from. I'm a breathing evidence that the journey of 1000Miles beginning with a single step. It's doesn't stop here, this is only the beginning. For you; It's never too late to set another goal, or dream a new dream.

Friday, October 7, 2011

I Love Being Trusted

It's is such a great feeling to realize how many are the people who trust in you. It's is something that we indirectly fight for for ages, and when somebody you truly admire look into your side and say; "I trust you" Its gives you a great feeling.

Personally I know I am trustwprthy, and it's a great feeling to know that I am not the only person who thinks that. So are many of my friends, my colleagues and my family. It's doesn't come as a suprize that God trusted me so much to offer me another chance to do right, just by giving me another day to watch the sun passing by. Isn't it great that he did the same for you?

Earlier today I was murdering the shopping. At one of the beautiful shopping gallaxies in Durban located in my hood, Bridge city Shopping Centre. I was doing groceries for my granny, only to find out that I was given so much more than I had to use. Since it's summer time now, the thought of walking into the clothing shop and grab some no so-expensive sandals couldn't skip my mind. I decided to walk in and do exactly what I was thinking. Hoping granny will not penalize me for doing as I please with her cash. Well it turned out as I thought. For she didn't complain.

After so many years of serving my family with great respect. Now it pays. It's only now that I realize this is the result the trustworthy I subconsciusly installed to my family. Now it's paying me back. I hope other kids could do the same with their families. Just "buy" that trust while you still can. You will be amazed what it can do for you in the near future. Otherwise if you would love to know more about the mall located at the heart of my hood, just click here than come back and tell me that KwaMashu is not a place to be. Kamnandi. Sisonke